I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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