My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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