I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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