Don't make out with my wife yet
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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