I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
You ate ashes out of my bong
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
