I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
