id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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