Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I just googled if crying burns calories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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