I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
