we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
