Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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