But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
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