david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize
