HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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