I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
29 People Who Do Dirty Things Just To Get Their Way
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.