i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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