I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize