1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize