Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
He shit in the fireplace
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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