Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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