well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
wow bdsm is so cute
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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