I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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