The maid of honor just puked.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that