Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
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