420 ftw
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize