Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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