Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
