that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize