Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
