i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
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i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
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i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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