I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
