Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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