am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize