Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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