a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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