Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
