But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
The uberlube is also flammable
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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