So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
