everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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