my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
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You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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