Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Randomize