Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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