Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Come share oat with me in your robe
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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