I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
