I seem to have left my pride at pride
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
