we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
The struggles of a small town man whore
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
