we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
