She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Is it because I queefed?
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
