yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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