loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
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