I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I looked at my own cervix.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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