She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I'm like, not good at living.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
